So much for playing safe in life, how boring. Lately, I have been very bored with my life. Well, not just lately, but more than an year. It seems like I am not experimenting enough, not making enough mistakes. Ten years into marriage (well, almost), I managed to find something new to do every year, for about 8 years. Last year and a half, has been stable. So stable it feels un-interesting. So, I’ve been itching to get some adventure back and pretty much everytime, that only happens when I attempt to do something that the rational minds would call – Stupid. And I have a very stupid thing to do on my agenda this month, Thank God I haven’t run out of them yet.
I was on a high, may be on the tipsy side for a few months last year. I was turning thirty. So, I did some crazy stuff, things I had listed in my “before 30” bucket list. I jumped from the sky, wore a long backless dress, tried some drinking (yes, I had managed to stay virgin in that department until I was 29.8) and finished my MBA. It felt good to throw a career goal in there, just to satisfy the “sane” side of me. I wouldn’t say it made my life too interesting for long, but it kept me busy for a few months to be planning for all this. Then a few weeks on facebook to be posting about all the stuff.
So, what do you do immediately after birthday? Some people get depressed, some people get happy its over. I make goals. Like many people, I set resolutions and goals too. Only I do it on my birthday rather than the new years’. With my birthday last year being such a big milestone, there came big goals asking for major shifts in the paradigm and what not. But seven months into the 1st of the thirties, nothing has happened. Steve jobs lived and died, his book read and shelved, inspirations rose and fell. No change. My immediate action item this week – Buy the iPad 3 on March 16th. That’s as close as I could get to Steve. And he is my inspiration. Damn, I feel like a looser.
Call it ADHD, but I get very restless when things are not moving fast enough in my life, and by fast I mean, very fast. And they have to be changing at the same speed too. I like to call it my “renaissance soul” side. So, as much as I like stability and regularity, I like life to be a little unpredictable. At this time, I can totally predict what my 2012 is looking like. And I think its time for a change. Remembering my favourite lines from Steve jobs Stanford commencement –
When I was 17, I read a quote that went something like: “If you live each day as if it was your last, someday you’ll most certainly be right.” It made an impression on me, and since then, for the past 33 years, I have looked in the mirror every morning and asked myself: “If today were the last day of my life, would I want to do what I am about to do today?” And whenever the answer has been “No” for too many days in a row, I know I need to change something.
And I know I need to change something. And I know I am craving for something crazy, stupid, insane. And this is what I am going to do,very soon. Even if that means jumping from the sky without a parachute.